Dear Abby: BF is way too close with needy boss
Dear Abby I am a man whose long-distance boyfriend of one year has a married female best friend She s his boss She is also a tobacco-addicted narcissist who drinks a lot They chat on the phone and text for hours every day because as he puts it she can t be alone I think she uses him to compensate for her insecurities I also think she s a bad influence on him We see each other only every other week because of the physical distance between us and then only for a day and a half Last weekend while I was there she texted him and demanded if we would come spend the evening and drink with her I stated him absolutely not I am protective of our time together and have no desire to spend any time with her The closeness they share really bothers me They have been friends for years but their relationship feels weirdly close to me It s almost like a pseudo romance I don t know what to do I really love this man but I often feel like a third wheel We talk every night and he mentions her every single night I m tired of it When he mentions her name I physically cringe I have tried talking to him about my feelings concerning this but he isn t interested in talking about it He defends her adamantly What should I do Feeling Stuck in Indiana Dear Feeling Stuck Your boyfriend s relationship with this woman predates the one he has with you by years If he was concerned about your feelings or about discussing their relationship he would make several changes My advice is to find another boyfriend who shows more consideration Dear Abby My ex-partner has a dog Butch who is years old I lived with Butch for almost three years Butch is a rescue who has specific trauma from his earlier life He s shy and timid and doesn t like children or vacuum cleaners I also have a dog who lived with me during the time we lived with Butch Last year while our house was being vacuumed by a housekeeper Butch bit her on her calf I was there along with my dog I attended to the woman and made sure she was OK I also put Butch in a separate room When my partner came home I reported him what had happened but he seemed unfazed Fast-forward six months My partner and I have parted strategies and he decided to ditch Butch so he can passage and play pickleball with his new victim He gave Butch to his niece who has two small children without disclosing the dog s biting history In fact he explained his family that MY dog bit the housekeeper not Butch I was present when the bite occurred and he is lying I have advised the family that I have concerns for the children and Butch s fate should he bite again His former owner will not own up to the truth I would like your take on this ticking time bomb Knows the Truth in Michigan Dear Knows Contact your ex-boyfriend s niece right away and tell her that Butch presents a danger to her children If she doesn t believe you offer to have the housekeeper who was bitten vouch for your honesty As much as I like dogs that one does not belong in a household with children Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren also known as Jeanne Phillips and was founded by her mother Pauline Phillips Contact Dear Abby at www DearAbby com or P O Box Los Angeles CA
